• Chase has applied for a higher position within the company he is currently working for. We have heard nothing about it.
• I have been getting about 4 hours of sleep on average every night due to kids with bad dreams or bad attitudes (refusing to give in to sleep and standing in their bed screaming angrily because they don't know how to get out!)!
• Our 18 month old snuck into our room and got my glasses off the nightstand and broke off the ear piece completely.
• The washing machine overflowed. It took 13 towels and 3 twin size quilts (hey, ya use what ya have!) to get it dried up.
• I suffered from a headache for over 24 hours in spite of taking medicine.
• The water heater in our apartment broke. Actually, it didn't just break. The bottom of it completely rusted away and the water came gushing into our kitchen and living room.
• Due to not having water overnight while waiting for the water heater to be replaced, we had to stay with a cousin. On the way there, I accidentally grabbed my necklace as I was adjusting the seatbelt and completely snapped the chain in half.
I'm frustrated. I'm overwhelmed. I want to just quit. I want to go lay in bed with the blanket over my head. Not from depression. Just from fear of what's gonna happen next. However, with an infant, a toddler, and 2 preschoolers, that's not an option!
As I sat in the backyard at my cousin's house, watching my older two daughters run and play and conquer their fears on the slide, watching my youngest daughter tramp through the grass wearing nothing but a diaper and trailing her blanket behind her, listening to the thunder sound forth from a dry sky, I was overwhelmed and fatigued. I felt like I couldn't face another day. Then suddenly, a beautiful sight appeared before my eyes.
After the flood, God promised Noah that He would NEVER flood the entire earth again. He didn't say that parts of the earth wouldn't experience flooding, but that the entire earth would not face that punishment again. Then He put the rainbow in the sky as a sign of His promise so that when we see it we'll know that God is keeping His promise. Watching my daughters in awe over seeing a rainbow for the first time, reminded me of the splendor of such a sight. It was as if God was telling me, "you're experiencing flooding - literal and figurative - in your life right now, but it's only in areas. Your entire world is not going to come crashing down because of these floods. You will not drown in these waters that feel like they are overtaking you. I am with you. This rainbow is a sign of my promise to you that you will not drown in these waters." Oh how that sight spoke to my heart.
That should have been enough. That was enough. Then God blessed me with another beautiful sight, as though He wanted to confirm to me that He is still in control and that He truly was speaking to me through the rainbow. As I moved from my sitting position in the grass and began pushing my older two daughters on the swings, this picture from heaven appeared before my eyes.
Elizabeth said, "Look Momma! The clouds are moving so God can come through! God is coming! Hi, God!" He used my little girl's awe of His painting in the sky to confirm His promise to me and to remind me that He is awesome and powerful. He reminded my weary brain that, no matter the circumstances, He is in control of all. Though I don't understand it, His way is perfect.
After the flood, God promised Noah that He would NEVER flood the entire earth again. He didn't say that parts of the earth wouldn't experience flooding, but that the entire earth would not face that punishment again. Then He put the rainbow in the sky as a sign of His promise so that when we see it we'll know that God is keeping His promise. Watching my daughters in awe over seeing a rainbow for the first time, reminded me of the splendor of such a sight. It was as if God was telling me, "you're experiencing flooding - literal and figurative - in your life right now, but it's only in areas. Your entire world is not going to come crashing down because of these floods. You will not drown in these waters that feel like they are overtaking you. I am with you. This rainbow is a sign of my promise to you that you will not drown in these waters." Oh how that sight spoke to my heart.
That should have been enough. That was enough. Then God blessed me with another beautiful sight, as though He wanted to confirm to me that He is still in control and that He truly was speaking to me through the rainbow. As I moved from my sitting position in the grass and began pushing my older two daughters on the swings, this picture from heaven appeared before my eyes.
Elizabeth said, "Look Momma! The clouds are moving so God can come through! God is coming! Hi, God!" He used my little girl's awe of His painting in the sky to confirm His promise to me and to remind me that He is awesome and powerful. He reminded my weary brain that, no matter the circumstances, He is in control of all. Though I don't understand it, His way is perfect.
"My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts," says The Lord. "And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:8-9
The reason these things are happening all at the same time, make no sense to me. In my human-ness, I cannot understand how this all "works together for my good". I don't understand, but I don't have to.
Thank you, God, for using your marvelous handiwork to remind me that you are powerful and in control of all! Thank you for reminding me of your majesty and glory!
I don't know if this makes any sense (hey, it's 2:30 AM!!!), but I tried. That counts for something, right????? :-)
ReplyDeleteThis made perfect sense =D Enjoyed reading it and just want to say to hang in there..all of us have to go through times like these and while hard, I find that attitude and faith can really change one's whole perspective through trials.
ReplyDeleteAs you said it is also awesome that he gives us the wonderful signs in nature that show us he is still in control